Glitch - Merry Christmas [Gift]

It's Christmas and I want to say thank you Glitch-ChanGX for being through with my life.

I'm still working on my secret Santa gift but 2018 is one of the terrible years I've gone through and Glitch has been here for me for so long. I don't know what's a good present to have other than having him in my life along with very few others in my journey.

Some come and some leaves. That's how life is and I'm the type who can't be happy with changes. I miss my missing childhood and memories from my past and I wanted to stay around the 00's decades. Many things and places keep changing, it's how humans evolve. But what about those who don't?

Either way, the way I think and brought up, I slowly lose connection and meaning to life the more I continue staying on this planet Earth. I even lose empathy and lack of care because my brain also doesn't function what's to be... "normal".

Maybe, if I didn't come to a Stockholm-like Syndrome where one person like me falls in love with somebody and then turns mad or lost in direction after freedom from toxic relationships... Maybe I wouldn't turn in this path? (Also, I believe that's also what you call a "Yandere" too because it means a person who's sick, usually mentally ill when being in love.)

I even lack how friendships work and learn the hard way to get hurt for not understanding, even the common senses of what to be "human". And Glitch, I met him online 5-6 years ago and even when I move or went away temporary like breaks and hiatus... Glitch is still with me whenever I need him and I did the same back.

After receiving a message from Glitch, I couldn't help think about him. I'm guilty I still haven't sent my package back but he said it's fine yet I still feel bad. I'm falling depressed again from overthinking what's going to happen in the unknown future. Sometimes I knew there are certain actions for me to proceed a certain timeline and now, I'm very anxious what awaits of me next year.

Besides Kingdom Hearts III, there's hardly anything I want to do with my own life.

Yet.

The reason is because Glitch mentions something about having goals in life. The this is, I don't have one and all I do is sit there and wait for something to happen. One example of a possible goal is to be hired by my favourite YouTuber as his video editor as a job. Another is Glitch comes to Australia for me but that has to wait. But now, I can't think of any other goals in my life.


P.S. Glitch, if you're reading this, you're the best, even if I don't have the heart to give you when it was once stolen from me. But somewhere lost inside of me, I do feel emotions again, maybe crying with lots of words to say back other than just a thank you.